Song to listen to: “Godspeed” by James Blake

Sometimes, you fuck up and you don’t get any more chances.

Sometimes, uncertainty of the future requires you to surrender and to finally let go so that you can make room for the things that will love you and uplift you.

And sometimes you don’t realize what you have until it’s not in your life anymore. You can’t keep taking advantage of those who love you and uplift you, because you couldn’t see the value and worth in them. They finally saw love and value and worse in themselves and they had to let you go not out of animosity or anger over how abusive you were to them. But they can’t keep clawing at a brick wall anymore.

As a woman, I’ve given so much of myself in relationships. It was beautiful and it was dangerous for me to do so. I ended up losing myself in them. Not only that, but what made it more painful was not having that reciprocated in my life. It took me years to realize my value and worth, empowering me to pursue mutually beneficial relationships and partnerships.